Crazy Taxi

The Good
Those looking for deep, rich fun need not look here ! It's pure arcade, out of control action ! For the uninitiated, Crazy Taxi is a game where you pick up passengers and take them to their destinations on time to get paid "CRAZY MONEY !" Now that you're initiated, you are now ready to make CRAZY MONEY !

Gameplay-

Picking up random strangers and taking them places might sound like a bad idea, but it's actually fun ! You know, because here there's no muggers or hookers wanting rides here. I think it's time to get to the gameplay mechanics before my mind wanders somewhere else. I'm not sure the cabbies you play would mind that much anyway. You get four to choose from. Axel, a punker with a bad attitude and a awesome head of green hair. Gena, the hottie of the bunch, who gerunckle isperabby kththththhh blabablab, uh what was I saying ? oh yeah, cabbies. The ultra hip, hip hop dude B.D. Joe, and the middle age Vegas type of guy Gus. You have quite a colorful cast to choose from, but more cabbies would have been nice. I personally like Axel the most.

Anyway, passengers are ranked by how much they'll pay you, and how far you have to take them. Red and orange for quick "CRAZY MONEY !" and short distances, yellow and green for long distances and lots of "CRAZY MONEY !". To pick up a passenger just stop in they're highlighted ring and they'll jump in your cab. To get your "CRAZY MONEY !" you'll need to get them there in the time limit above their head. If it runs out they jump out of your cab even at full speed ! Why did they jump out ? Maybe you hit too many cars along the way. Yes, you can hit cars in this game and not come to a screeching halt ! You can even knock over a bus ! It'll slow you down, but it's still cool ! What's even more, cool is the ability to drive ON THE SIDEWALK, UNDERWATER, AND JUMP OVER CARS IN TRAFFIC ! You'll need a ramp for that last one but still ! You can even scatter pedestrians, but not run them over. (Hey, this isn't GTA !) All of this is determined by how far you get within the main time limit. You can choose from three to ten minutes to pick up as many passengers and "CRAZY MONEY !" as you can. Worried about getting lost ? No worries, as a huge arrow points the direction you need to go. Once the time limit runs out, you're graded on your performance. I usually rank a B.

"But Daniel ? I've played all the different mission times and the afternoon isn't over yet ? WHAT WILL I DO !?" Go out and play in the sun ! Yeah I know, it's cold outside (Or hot depending on what time of year you read this review.), but it might be fun ! Just remember to bring a Game Boy. Anyway, after you finish the main modes, there are a slew of mini games to play. The only ones different from the normal part of the game are the "CRAZY JUMP !" and "CRAZY BOWLING !". All are fairly fun, but only marginally. Over all for the gameplay, CRAZY fun !

Sound-

YEAH YEAH YEAH YEEEEEAH YEAAAAHHHH ! Whoops ! Sorry, it's a very catchy song. Well since it's stuck in my head, I'll reveal that the soundtrack for this game is provided by the Offspring and Bad Religion ! I've never heard of the latter, but the Offspring deliver the best track of the whole game. It goes, YEAH YEAH YEAH YEEEEEAH YEAAAAHHHH ! OK I promise not to do that anymore. Fortunately the rest of the game measures up. Loud crashes, big bangs and most of the passengers have something to say ! I love it when Axel gets mad and says "Yeah yeah I got it !" It's also fun to hear the pedestrians scream when you're coming. Then there's the narrator, but I'll get to him later. So to wrap it up for sound, CRAZY good !

Graphics-

Stunning for their time, they've aged better than most. The people all look angular, but the texture mapping has managed to look good because of it's simplicity. Nice vibrant colors are much nicer to look at than ugly complicated ones. That's not to say they're without detail, (That would be CRAZY !). All the houses, buildings, cars, people and other objects are nicely rendered with a very nice style. The beaches and the hills look the best. Given that this was a Dreamcast port, it's held up even better to the test of time. Most Dreamcast to PS2 ports look rough now looking back on them. (Ecco comes to mind.) It's really hard to get more descriptive than that with a arcade game, but I'm trying ! Overall for graphics, CRAZY FRESH ! I know I know, I'll stop. Maybe.

Control-

Simple. Simple simple simple. And responsive ! You have the gas, brake, horn and a button to toggle reverse and drive. Nuff said.

The Bad
Gameplay-

The game starts to wear "CRAZY !" thin after a while. Sure it's arcade action at it's best, but that's the problem. It's an arcade game. It was meant for ten minutes of play. Most likely the time you run out of quarters. This was not meant for days on end of play. it's fun for that afternoon of fun, but you'll likely feel more than a little bored after a while. Don't get any delusions that this is Gran Turismo. Also, I found it hard to get around town. It was too easy to get stuck on sidewalks, and when knocking over a big bus, it was hard to get out it's way on time. Oh did I mention all the name brand stores in the game ? ("yo ! Take me to Pizza Hut !") It's a sad reminder of what Sega was willing to do keep themselves afloat at the time. Overall, it's fun, but ultimately a shallow ride.

Sound-

There are only two things that stink in the sound department. One. The announcer. He's so out of place ! He sounds like somebody from a truck stop ! And his adding "CRAZY !" to everything gets old the THIRD time you hear it. Second. Sure you have the Offspring and Bad Religion as the soundtrack. That sounds like a dream, but it's painfully apparent how much money Sega was losing at the time (Apart from the aforementioned name brand name stores.) because they only licensed FOUR songs. Even YEAH YEAH YEAH YEEEEEAH YEAAAAHHHH ! gets mind numbing after a while. Yeah yeah I know I promised. Sue me. And the game kept skipping some songs after 30 seconds ! That might be just my disk, but it's very annoying.

Graphics-

Fortunately the graphics only suffer from common problems of their day. Some of the pop-up became pretty bad near the ocean. A whole mountain popped up twenty feet in front of me ! At one point the whole road clipped out in front of me ! That only happened once, but it's troubling. And the texture resolution is really starting to show it's age.

The Bottom Line
Great fun for a weekend, but not much of classic. I still recommend picking it up anyway since it's so cheap, but don't get your hopes up too high.