Carmageddon

aka: Carmageddon 3D, Carmageddon: Fahr zur Hölle!, Hole Hege
Moby ID: 367

DOS version

For those who are about to experience this for the first time. We salute you!

The Good
A SCOTUS Judge sits impatiently as he listens to lawyers bickering about video game law. One argues that video games are pushing the boundaries of art and any attempt to categorize them will be short sighted. The other argues that they have unnecessary levels of graphic going to mention games where players are allowed to urinate, and encouraged to beat up hookers and go on drive by shootings. The judge feels a bit of vomit in his mouth. He finds it disturbing that people like to perform these virtual acts of sadism and call it “entertainment”. He doesn’t remember the day when the screams of 500 grannies were silenced by the screech of burning rubber, made by homicidal car drivers. Those drivers, they will never forget what it was like to be out on a Sunday drive in the countryside, the fresh smell of morning air, the usual screaming of the lambs and the whistling of the Postman Pat tune as the windscreen wipers would scrub off the bloody remains of their girlfriend’s torso. Nor shall they forget the little moments when the sound cars horn would be enough for a herd of blind people to jump off a building. Ah yes those were the days when hurling your best friends vehicle into a stone wall at 180mph was considered friendly communication. Not to mention the sheer force of it being done with a V8 engine with granite armor. They will never forget.

The Bad
Unfortunately time can impair our memories. Like an old photograph, it loses its colors and begins to fade. But the satisfaction of hearing the voices doesn’t change and only gets better with each round.

The Bottom Line
The people at SCOTUS will not remember such days. But for those who were in the middle, right there in the driver’s seat as they heard the squishy sounds of a lamb being ripped apart. They will never forget.

by Gravesy (46) on December 25, 2010

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