Metroid: Other M

The Good
Ryu Hayabusa: "Back in the late Eighties...I remember watching you put me down for other games. I know I hurt you, never able to finish my game, and I apologize for the hardships in our relationship. You see, ever since my debut on the NES and Arcade, I have dreamed of greener pastures. I started out, just a Ninja on the streets. I've moved up to rocky landscapes, snowy slopes, wicked fast trains, and even Mount Rushmore. (Cut from Ninja Gaiden on NES, due to cutting off Theodore Roosevelt's mustache. Sorry Teddy. Forgive me?)

As a well known Ninja, I know I've accomplished alot as far as gracing the highest and most difficult of altitudes on our dear planet. Unfortunately, there is one place I still have yet to sneak upon...Outer Space. So, when I remind myself of the late Eighties, and the thousands of times when you threw my cartridge across the room, only to put in Metroid, I start to question my beliefs. Am I really any good? (Yes. Yes, I am. I am Awesome.)

Metroid: Other M makes me realize I am a great Ninja, and I really need to pollute the rest of the Galaxy with my good looks. (I'm really good looking. You should see the babes I hang with.) Other M has taken my remakes and reconstructed them into the Metroid universe. It's almost as if Team Ninja stuck my d**k in a blender with a Morph Ball and had Samus Screw Attack out. (And it tastes really good.)

Other M is like the Arcade version of Ninja Gaiden...it's fun, less frustrating, and very handsome. (I am so very handsome.) You should definitely play this game.

The Bad
Samus Aran: "..." (Thumbs Down)

The Bottom Line
Other M captures all the exciting elements of Metroid minus the extensive exploration. The story/cutscenes are ridiculously laughable, yet entertainingly bad.