m j @wiggedoutfruitflywoman

Shadows of Cairn (Windows 3.x)

This game is so incredibly bad, that it is amazing.

The Good
The greatest thing about this game was it's incredible awfulness. It is incredible that you can play the whole thing on invincible mode and it's been awhile since I played it, but you can beat the whole stupid, useless thing just by climbing the castle wall in one of the opening sequences. That's right, you don't even have to play more than five minutes before you can watch the entire ending sequence complete with several women of various sorts who sound exactly like men. I sincerely believe that there was only one voice actor, okay two at the max, for the entire soundtrack. The greatest scene in all of video game history has to be where Quinn goes down to the sewer and talks to the fat guy who has stolen the crazy guy's 'dog'. And I quote: Quinn: The old man says you have his dog. I'm here to take it from you Fat Guy: That warn't no dog, it wuz a rat and I'm gonna eat 'im. Quinn: I can't let you do that. Wow! I will never forget the incredible psychoticness of those lines. I laughed till I cried.

You absolutely must have this game to pass down to your children as the best example of unintentional comedy ever created.

The Bad
Well, honestly, I think it was supposed to be taken seriously and if you didn't use the invincibility setting it was impossible to beat, well, unless you climbed that wall.

The Bottom Line
A game so incredibly crappy without meaning to be, that you have to respect it.

Besides that, an interesting role playing set-up with nice settings and good enough graphics for what you are paying.

By m j on November 5, 2001