Forums > Off Topic > Happy Yuletide!

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The Fabulous King (1332) on 12/24/2010 6:05 PM · Permalink · Report

It is I, Rabbi Guru (and part-time Siberian Santa) and this is my friend Rasta. Together we wish you Happy Yuletide and Good Times Forever!

Bring out the alcohol! For tomorrow is yet far away! Besides, it's the 12 days of christmas and I plan to celebrate every one of them :D.

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The Fabulous King (1332) on 12/25/2010 4:44 PM · Permalink · Report

I, Rabbi Guru and my buddy Rasta would also like to introduce you to this christmas special we watched yesterday.

A Nostalgia Critic Christmas!

Do you know the tale about the christmas that almost wasn't? Well this is not about that...

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DJP Mom (11333) on 12/26/2010 3:52 AM · Permalink · Report

Kind of like a ghost town here tonight, just a little creepy... =/

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Unicorn Lynx (181769) on 12/26/2010 4:28 AM · Permalink · Report

I have a Christmas tree! For the first time in my life! (well, not counting the "New Year trees" we've had every year when I was a Soviet kid).

The following dialogue often occurs when a Chinese person enters my house:

Chinese Person (noticing the tree): Oh, I know that. It's the holiday you, foreigners, celebrate
Me: Well, no, actually my people don't celebrate Christmas.
CP: ???
Me: I'm Jewish. We don't have Christmas.
CP: (compassionately): So you don't have holidays?...
Me: We do. A lot of them. Just not Christmas. We have Chanuka around the same time, though.
CP (thinking hard): If this is the case... why do you have this tree?..
Me: My girlfriend is Catholic. She is the one who celebrates Christmas, I'm just celebrating along.
CP: But isn't your girlfriend Chinese?!
Me: She is.
CP (completely lost now): But... how...??..
Me: She is Chinese and Catholic at the same time.

[Chinese Person is unable to process this information]

So yup, Christmas! To promote friendship between religions, my girlfriend and I sing Christmas songs with Hebrew lyrics. Try singing the melody of "I Wish You a Merry Christmas" with "Hevenu Shalom Alechem" lyrics. Sounds awesome! :)

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chirinea (47507) on 12/26/2010 4:35 AM · edited · Permalink · Report

Christmas ends up being a holiday which goes beyond the religious meaning. My fiancée is an atheist and she loves it, for her it is just one time in the year when family gets together and enjoy themselves, exchanging gifts and stuff.

Anyway, Merry Christmas to all of you, whatever your reason to celebrate it is.

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Slug Camargo (583) on 12/26/2010 10:10 PM · Permalink · Report

Jewish Russian guy moves in with Catholic Chinese girlfriend. You really should write a sit-com, there's a lot of potential there :P

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Klaster_1 (57610) on 12/26/2010 7:23 PM · Permalink · Report

There are no santas in Siberia, only Grandfather Frost.

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The Fabulous King (1332) on 12/26/2010 10:01 PM · Permalink · Report

Chys Khan and Yamal Iri would like to have a talk with you about your imperialistic tendencies.

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Klaster_1 (57610) on 12/26/2010 10:11 PM · Permalink · Report

Chys Khan isn't from Siberia either.

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The Fabulous King (1332) on 12/26/2010 10:14 PM · edited · Permalink · Report

Yakutia is in Siberia.

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Klaster_1 (57610) on 12/27/2010 8:18 AM · Permalink · Report

OK, I was wrong.

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The Fabulous King (1332) on 12/27/2010 3:49 PM · edited · Permalink · Report

Don't worry. I like all the Russian Santas best.

They have the coolest costumes ever. Happy Holidays!

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Zovni (10504) on 12/27/2010 1:24 PM · Permalink · Report

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ETJB (428) on 12/28/2010 7:21 PM · Permalink · Report

I have a some what more...unique history with holidays. My [immediate] family and I are Reform-Jewish, but we grew up in Saudi Arabia where it is not really practical to be Jewish, let alone celebrate Jewish holidays. So, we grew up with secularized version of Christmas [and I am pretty familiar with the Islamic rituals as well].

Having returned to the United States, my immediate family continues to celebrate both Hanukkah and a secular-family centered version of Christmas.

Thus, I Amazon gift cards for Christmas and Hanukkah and now have to look some good graphic adventure games that will play on a Windows 7 laptop [hint, hint anyone reading this]

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Klaster_1 (57610) on 12/28/2010 7:44 PM · Permalink · Report

Gray Matter, Kaptain Brawe.

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Unicorn Lynx (181769) on 12/29/2010 4:34 AM · Permalink · Report

My [immediate] family and I are Reform-Jewish, but we grew up in Saudi Arabia where it is not really practical to be Jewish, let alone celebrate Jewish holidays.

Hmm, why did you go there, then? If I lived in a country where I couldn't be openly Jewish, I'd leave this country immediately.

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Slug Camargo (583) on 12/29/2010 4:47 AM · Permalink · Report

[Q --start חד-קרן·山猫 wrote--]My [immediate] family and I are Reform-Jewish, but we grew up in Saudi Arabia where it is not really practical to be Jewish, let alone celebrate Jewish holidays.

Hmm, why did you go there, then? If I lived in a country where I couldn't be openly Jewish, I'd leave this country immediately. [/Q --end חד-קרן·山猫 wrote--] I'd ask the same to you: After all, you live in a country where you can't be openly a father, in a manner of speaking, which looks way worse to me.

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Unicorn Lynx (181769) on 12/29/2010 4:48 AM · Permalink · Report

After all, you live in a country where you can't be openly a father

Huh? What do you mean?

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Slug Camargo (583) on 12/29/2010 7:29 AM · Permalink · Report

[Q --start חד-קרן·山猫 wrote--]After all, you live in a country where you can't be openly a father

Huh? What do you mean? [/Q --end חד-קרן·山猫 wrote--] I mean all that trouble you went through when your baby was born and your in-laws took over the place and whatnot, and having to stand it all because it was some kind of timeless tradition. If I got the story right you used to have lots of problems even getting to see your kid, and the whole thing was what ended up killing your previous relationship; and at least to me that sounds much scarier than not being able to celebrate a religious holiday. Seriously, just reading about what you've been through made me hate China with a passion --screw those (admittedly, very pretty) moustached dragons and whatever :P, it just wouldn't be me if I can't give my in-laws the finger and take off with my wife and kid.

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Unicorn Lynx (181769) on 12/29/2010 7:58 AM · Permalink · Report

No, no, wait, all these troubles I've been having are not the fault of Chinese legal divorce system. On the contrary, it was very fair - the hearing was quick and painless, and the judge listened and took into consideration everything I had to say.

We can talk on and on about the problems of Chinese society, but it's not the society/laws/government that prevent me from seeing my kid. It's my ex-wife, and only her.

the whole thing was what ended up killing your previous relationship

What killed my previous relationship was what I took as lack of respect from the part of my ex-wife, nothing else. I simply couldn't stay with a person who didn't respect and didn't bother to know me. Also, threatening to call the police and throwing my mother out of the house kinda closed the deal.

It's neither Chinese tradition nor Chinese laws that killed that relationship.

it just wouldn't be me if I can't give my in-laws the finger and take off with my wife and kid.

That's because your wife would follow you. That's the whole difference. My ex-wife refused to follow me when I suggested we simply don't live with her parents. She actually had a plan that involved buying an apartment for them (which I did with my own money), and having the kid grow up living with them, not with us (which I could not accept) - that was the only kind of separate living she agreed to.

It wasn't the problem of her parents. It was her problem. She was the one who made the choice, not her mother and father. Sure, her parents are typical greedy little Shanghainese characters, but that wasn't the problem. I didn't marry her parents, I married her. That she chose her parents over me was her problem, not theirs.

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ETJB (428) on 1/5/2011 10:06 PM · edited · Permalink · Report

I grew up in Saudi Arabia, largely because my father had a job offer over their and, frankly, it was the best financial offer for a man struggling to stay afloat with a wife and four kids.

It was a very...interesting experience and certainly helped to shape my world view on a wide range of topic issues [which I am not sure we will discuss], i.e. foreign policy, globalization, human rights,

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The Fabulous King (1332) on 1/6/2011 7:50 PM · Permalink · Report

Merry Russian Christmas too!

They celebrate it now.

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ETJB (428) on 1/6/2011 9:19 PM · Permalink · Report

Yes, Russians can celebrate Christmas, as long as it not done in a gay way [given the level of violent homophobia that seems to spill out in Russia].

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The Fabulous King (1332) on 1/6/2011 9:33 PM · Permalink · Report

They can celebrate?

That's a very interesting way to word it. Rasta says that it's so nice when people allow other people to celebrate their holidays. He says he was being ironical.

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ETJB (428) on 1/10/2011 3:31 PM · Permalink · Report

Was he now?

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Starbuck the Third (22602) on 1/10/2011 7:42 PM · Permalink · Report

[Q --start Rabbi Guru wrote--]They can celebrate?

That's a very interesting way to word it. Rasta says that it's so nice when people allow other people to celebrate their holidays. He says he was being ironical.

[/Q --end Rabbi Guru wrote--]

Now why does that guy look strangely like George Bush in a santa outfit? maybe I'm finally starting to see things.

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Pseudo_Intellectual (66423) on 1/10/2011 7:50 PM · Permalink · Report

No, it's clearly Wilson from Home Improvement.